How I Cultivated Compassion for Myself through Human Design
Join me as I explore "How I Cultivated Compassion for Myself through Human Design" and learn to embrace your true self.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been trying to maintain a consistent exercise routine and an optimal diet (that was also ridiculously rigid) so that I would have this abundance of energy every day. But, I never could maintain it. I would have these moments of amazing energy and creativity and be able to work for hours.
Projects would get down, closets cleaned out, pantries organized, and then I would need a few days of lying around doing nothing. All my consistency would fall by the wayside. I’d beat myself up for days on how I’d quit, let myself down, once again.
I would be so annoyed and irritated with myself. And not understand why I just couldn’t be consistent. I’d spend days, weeks, beating myself up. Quitting on all efforts of health and wellness. Only to finally get the urge again to get my act together and start all over again.
Only to then repeat the cycle over and over again! I’d be energized and motivated one minute and exhausted and miserable the next.
So, naturally I would dive deep into self help, books on habits, loving self, growing, etc. And then I’d either be motivated or feel worse about myself and start this endless cycle repeatedly.
On one of my self help discovery deep dives, I learned that I was a 5/1 Manifestor with an Emotional Authority. If you’re familiar with Human Design and the types, then you may be going “ahhhh.” Yeah, she was trying to thrive as a Manifestor in a Generator world. Yeah, I was.
For those of you not familiar with Human Design, let me give you a quick summary. So that you can follow along for the rest of this article.
What is Human Design?
Human Design is a synthesis of ancient and modern sciences, offering a unique approach to understanding human beings. Created by Ra Uru Hu in the late 1980s, it combines elements from the I Ching, astrology, Kabbalah, the Hindu-Brahmin chakra system, and quantum mechanics to create a genetic blueprint of an individual. The fundamental aspect of Human Design is that it provides a specific “design type” for each person, identified through their birth data.
I know, some of you may roll your eyes right about now on this astrological woo-woo stuff. However, I will say that the information I’ve learned about myself and the Husband through Human Design has been profound and helped enhance my self awareness in a way that’s hard to explain. Even the attorney husband has found some truths in his chart.
As with everything, I encourage you to get curious about your doubt and what’s the real harm in exploring. If it doesn’t feel right for you, then let it go. And on the other hand, it could be the first step in understanding why every decision, from career choices to personal relationships, feels like a struggle against the current.
Human Design Types
There are five primary types in Human Design: Manifestors, Generators, Projectors, Reflectors, and Manifesting Generators. Each type has its own strategy for deciding and interacting with the world, influencing how individuals expend their energy and interact with others. By understanding one’s type, along with other detailed aspects of their chart such as Authorities and Centers, individuals can make more aligned decisions, leading to a life of less resistance and more authenticity.
This system offers profound insights into personal behavior and the mechanics of our interactions. Learning about one’s Human Design can lead to greater self-awareness and compassion, as it reveals not only one’s strengths and potential but also inherent challenges, helping individuals navigate their paths with greater ease and understanding.
My Human Design Chart
Human Design Manifestor
As a Human Design Manifestor with emotional authority, my experience is quite unique and deeply personal. Being a Manifestor means I inherently possess the energy to initiate and create change, not just in my life, but also affecting those around me. This trait empowers me to start new projects and ideas with no need to wait for others’ approval or input, which can be both liberating and daunting.
With reflection, I see this come up in my life that when I talk about an idea or taking action and I get an agitated or cold response from people. I’m energetically “pushing” people to take action that might not be ready. The strategy to help manage this energy is for me to inform others before taking action.
Which sounds simple and possible unnecessary, but I can tell you that when I inform my husband of my plans to tackle an organization project or make a decision, things go a lot more smoothly rather than me just doing it.
That’s just one simple example. When I was in a corporate role and started informing people of ideas and plans before just laying out the action steps, I was received with enthusiasm versus resistance. Life flows more when I inform people in small and big ways.
Human Design Emotional Authority
Another key aspect of Human Design is the energy center that has authority over your decision-making. You know, that “feeling” you get when something is right or wrong? My decision-making authority is my emotional center. My emotional authority plays a crucial role in how I operate. Unlike those who can decide in the moment, I need to ride the wave of my emotions to find clarity. This means that I experience highs and lows emotionally, and it’s essential for me to wait until I reach a neutral emotional state before making significant decisions. Acting in the heat of an emotional moment can lead to choices that don’t truly align with my deeper goals or well-being.
And my entire life, I’ve always followed the highs of my emotional wave. When I’m super excited, I just jump right in and then when that wave crests and goes back to neutral, my motivation and excitement disappears and I’m in a situation that at best is annoying at worst that I regret.
I’m still learning to ride my emotional wave and slow down to make decisions. This is extremely hard for me, but knowing that my emotional high doesn’t always mean that it’s right for me is such a great insight into cultivating greater self-awareness and alignment.
This combination of being a Manifestor and having emotional authority requires me to be patient and introspective, acknowledging the powerful influence my emotional state has on my actions. It’s a journey of constant learning and balancing—knowing when to push forward with my innate initiating power and when to pull back and allow my emotions to settle. It teaches me the importance of timing and authenticity in my interactions and decisions, shaping my path in profound ways.
Learning about my type, strategy and authority were just the beginning for me. For the first time, I felt like all these traits of mine were on purpose. That they were my design and so I no longer felt like I had these “broken” or “less-than” traits in me. This understanding gave me a great sense of peace and motivation to keep learning more about Human Design, and how learning about the nine centers helped my self-compassion grow.
The Nine Centers of Human Design
Human Design centers are key components of the Human Design system, which is a synthesis of ancient wisdom and modern science, providing a framework for understanding how we interact with the world and make decisions. There are nine centers in Human Design, each corresponding to specific aspects of our being and linked to specific functions in our life. These centers can be either defined (colored in) or undefined (white) in a person’s chart, influencing their personality and how they experience and react to the world.
Root Center: The center of pressure and drive, influencing our adrenaline flow and stress response. It drives us to get things done and move forward.
Sacral Center: Related to life force and work energy, this center is crucial for generating and sustaining energy, particularly related to work and productivity. It’s only defined in Generators and Manifesting Generators.
Solar Plexus Center: The emotional center, responsible for feelings, emotions, and sensitivity. It governs emotional waves and has a significant impact on decision-making for those with it defined.
Spleen Center: Associated with instinct, intuition, and survival. It’s the oldest awareness center and relates to fears, health, and well-being.
Heart/Will Center: Tied to willpower, ego, and self-esteem, this center influences our capacity to make commitments and promises, and to assert ourselves in the world.
Throat Center: The center of communication and action, where thoughts and feelings are expressed. It’s pivotal in making things happen in the physical realm.
Ajna Center: Linked to processing and analyzing information, the Ajna governs our mental processes and how we conceptualize ideas.
Head Center: The center of inspiration and mental pressure, it drives the mental processes connected with thinking about things that matter to us.
G Center: This center is related to identity, direction in life, and love. It plays a crucial role in giving us a sense of self and personal direction.
The defined or undefined status of these centers in an individual’s Human Design chart explains why people respond differently to similar situations, highlighting the uniqueness of each human being. For example, a defined Heart Center might make someone consistently driven and competitive, whereas an undefined Heart Center could mean the person struggles with self-esteem and fluctuates in their willpower. Understanding the dynamics of these centers can provide profound insights into a person’s behavior and optimal life strategies.
How Learning About my Open Centers Changed my Self Talk
The most impactful open center that I learned about was my open Sacral center. This means I lack consistent access to life force energy, which profoundly influences my approach to work and energy management. I don’t have the same endless motor that Generators do, so I need to be mindful about conserving energy and not over-committing myself. It teaches me the importance of rest and that it’s okay to say no, allowing me to honor my energy fluctuations and find balance.
This enormous weight lifted off of my shoulders. I no longer felt broken, like a constant failure regarding trying to maintain these consistent routines. What I always viewed as being “a quitter” was actually my rest periods. My energy isn’t steady and consistent. It has highs and lows, and I should build systems and routines that match that cycle - not force myself into someone else’s routine - that is most likely has a closed Sacral among other centers that are different than mine.
And so I did. I started thinking about what is the ideal way I want to wake up each morning that would always feel great. My answer, waking up before everyone else and having my coffee in leisure. So that’s what I started doing.
For once, I could keep up with it, and my trust in myself grew. And so I added journalling. And when I stuck with that, I started adding a morning walk with the dog.
But, the biggest change for me came when I didn’t stick with this new routine and I slept in. I have a new self-awareness and understand that my body and mind needed the rest. And I let that be that. I don’t create some narrative about how I’m a quitter. I can’t stick to anything, etc.
This example is only the tip of the iceberg of what I’ve learned about myself and the conditioning I’ve picked up along the way of living this life. I’ve begun examining every “should” in my life and reflect on if that’s really a “should” for me or just conditioning that’s burrowed itself deep in my mind.
If, while reading this article, you find yourself questioning all the things you’ve been beating yourself up over are maybe things you were never designed to do those things. I encourage you to learn more about your Human Design.
Human Design Resources
Here are my top sites that I use for Human Design information:
MyBodyGraph: This site will give you a free chart and basic information. You can also purchase a foundational analysis and an advanced analysis to go deep into your design. I regularly go back to my analysis and learn more and more about myself.
aHumanDesign.com: I like aHumanDesign.com site for it's glossary of terms. There is a lot of terminology and language around Human Design.
So tell me, are you intrigued or skeptical? If you already use your Human Design, drop your type below. I’d love to connect with others that have found insights on their life through Human Design.